Let It Happen

I happen to realise there is barely anything which is under my control. At the same time I also happen to think that letting things happen the way they are happening gives me some sense of vague calmness. Now, this can be disputed and I must say this is a very personal experience which is not only bound to change but is also going to be vastly different for each individual.

However, why am I mentioning it? It is because there are so many things happening all around about which I care but my caring or not caring for them does not matter at all. Those issues or things or phenomenons are bound to proceed the way regardless of how or what I think of it. Then why the fuck should I be sad or happy or excited or have any reaction to the things that are not affected by my thinking? 

But I am a human and I am bound to have reactions to issues/things that I can sense (read, see, learn etc) in some way. There has got to be some way to stay informed and not give a single fuck. A friend once told me quite recently, "you can't care about everything bro" and he could not have been more correct. It is true. Like I said before, no matter how strongly (or weakly) I 'feel' for something, it does not matter.

Tell me this though. How am I supposed to stay reaction-less when I see, let's say, a town which is now free of the pandemic and people are moving around like before 2020? Am I not bound to be jealous? And yet no matter how jealous I get, pandemic around me ain't going away anytime soon. 

People who are privileged, like me, can very easily cut off themselves from the harsh reality of the world and immerse themselves in an 'alternate reality'. All I need to do is change the type of pages and people I follow on social media, and stop following news. It works, yes. But there is also guilt. Guilt of not being despondent about something horrific. To me personally, cutting off perceives as disrespecting the people who are suffering something which I can avoid solely because I am privileged. 

Hope to find some way to be compassionate and still not give a fuck. Is that ironic?